A Venting Session

A venting Session

My family seemed to never have been empathetic to my emotions. They never wonder "What's making her cry?" instead they tell me to "stop the act" They never wonder what my thought process is when I'm in my room cutting my arms. They just send me off with EMT to the hospital and hope they keep me for what seems like forever. They never apologize for things they say or when they constantly gang up on me. The amount of verbal abuse I get in that house is ridiculous.

I'm also tired of the god damned favoritism in the house. How my sister is this perfect being and i'm the complete fuck up. I work, I help out around the house, I don't smoke anymore or drink, I don't sit on my ass all day playing on my phone or watching the stupid news. Somehow they're all oblivious to everything I do around there and find my sister completely flawless.

Today on my way to work I had to hold back tears which wasn't working too well. I'm mentally and emotionally shot. I had gotten into a fight with my sister yesterday and my mom had to bring it up this morning when I was in a relatively decent mood and therefor put me on the defense. As I was leaving while I was pissed off I left the door open. My sister called out how i'm a fucking hypocrite and I wanted to walk back and knock some of her teeth out.

My sister is the biggest hypocrite I know. She talks bad about people behind their backs then gets all butthurt when she catches people talking about her, she tells people to quit drinking when she herself is a binge drinker, She's not that great of a mom, her son is spoiled and demanding who expects to get whatever he wants whenever he wants and is only nice to my sister when he's asking for something, so she gets it for him. Otherwise he treats her like a slave. I suppose she needs to lay in the bed she made for herself but she has the nerve to call me a bad mother. As I recall, sure my son can be a little stinker but at least he's nice and affectionate to me and not just because he wants something. and I love him to bits and do what I can when i'm home and try to spend some bonding time with him. I don't just sit on my butt on a different floor from him watching television.

I guess this turned out to be more of a rant and off topic but the lack of empathy is ridiculous. I should just be the same way and not care about anyone. why not right? My sister thinks she can treat me like shit and i'll let her officially adopt my oldest. Boy is she in for a rude awakening.